"Oh boy, Hunk," Allura declared. "A triple quadruple decker lettuce, salami, pickle, bologna, whipped cream, tomato, roast beef, chocolate chip, yam, lasagne, cream cheese, and cole slaw sandwich on rye! Like, with fat free mayo, of course." The princess licked her lips at the sight of the enormous sumptuous meal in front of them.

"Deeerricious!!" Hunk cooed.

Allura was just about to sink her teeth into the sandwich, then she held back. "Oh yeah," she pondered. "Like, I've got to watch my girlish figure.We'll split it in half, eh, Hunk?" She turned her back to grab the knife. In that split second, Hunk opened his mouth and ate the sandwich whole. Allura whipped back, only to see an empty plate. "HEY!! What happened to my sandwich?!" She eyed her companion suspiciously; his neck being about two feet taller than normal and bearing the striking similarity to the missing meal.

"MMnnsnsnsnnnnmmp," Hunk mumbled. He swallowed, and the lump in his neck quickly travelled to his stomach. "Hehehehehehehehe!"

Allura scowled. "At least you could have left me something! I haven't eaten for two hours, you know."

"Hold on a minute, gang!" The song on the jukebox had just come to a close, and Keith and Lance approached the table where Allura, Hunk, and Pidge sat. "Allura, why don't you show us that letter from Pollux again?"

"What, this?" Allura reached into the pocket of her wrinkled red bellbottoms and pulled out a crinkled letter. "Oh, it's just from my cousin, Romelle. Like, she wanted me to come over to Pollux for a will reading."

Keith took the letter and read it aloud: "It would be to your advantage to come to the castle on Pollux for the reading of our late Uncle Timmy's will.. Being one of the few remaining relatives, you and I have the opportunity of inheriting a huge fortune."

Pidge adjusted his glasses. "According to my knowledge of family trees, Uncle Timmy had numerous oil wells, casinos, and research centers. This means he probably had quite a lot of dough."

"And, like a lot of dough could make a lot of pizzas, eh Hunk?" Allura whispered.

"Rrreah! Hehehehehe!"

"So, it's agreed, then?" Keith adjusted his ascot. "Let's get the Voltron machine, and head off to Pollux!"

"All right!" the gang yelled in agreement. Later, they all entered their respective positions in Voltron, and, after backing up slightly, the giant robot took off into outer space.

Too bad they wouldn't reach Pollux for a while...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Voltron Mystery 2

"Gang, this doesn't look like anywhere I've ever driven." The Voltron machine bounced over invisible rocks as it continued on its journey with Keith at the wheel.

"But, like the map says take a left turn."

"Are you sure you're not reading the map upside-down again, Allura?"

"No, Pidge. Look!" The two now argued incoherently over the piece of paper in the princess' hands. Suddenly, a sputtering sound was heard. "Oh no," Allura groaned.

"Keith?! You forgot to fill up Voltron before we left...AGAIN???" Lance joined in.

"Hey, I thought we had enough gas..."

"This happens EVERY time..."

"LANCE! Honest, I didn't..."

"Well, every time it's either that or a flat tire..." Just then, a loud boom was heard under Voltron's left foot. "Oh, GREAT."

* * *

"Well, this is terrific, Keithy," Lance moaned. "Here we are: out of gas, a flat tire, trapped on a dark rainy planet, and my hair's getting all messed up!"

"I can't understand it!" Allura declared. "Like, Romelle told me this map showed a short cut to Pollux."

"Some short cut. Hey!" Pidge pointed in front of him. "It looks like a house up there on that hill!"

"Maybe they have some gas we could buy off them. Come on gang!" With that, Keith galantly strode ahead towards the dark shadow on the top of the hill.

As they got closer to the building, it became clear that it was not just a house but a mansion! A very ominous looking mansion. "All right," Pidge exclaimed, "a gas station right outside!"

"And, like a ghost station right in front of us," Allura said in a shaking voice. The entire house was painted black. Nothing grew in the yard, not even crabgrass. Broken shutters slammed against the house from the storm's wind, and only a single faint light was seen inside.

"I'll see if anyone's inside." Keith went up a set of old worn stairs to the front door. Before he could even ring the bell, the door slowly creaked open. The inside looked black and empty. "Must have been the wind..." A loud crack of lightning illuminated the gang, along with a hideous face just inside the house.

"RIKES!!" Hunk immediately jumped into Allura's arms, sending the two of them crashing backwards onto the ground.

"SHEESH!! GET OFF, HUNK!!" The princess tried desperately to dislodge herself before she suffocated. Finally standing up, the two joined the gang in staring at the figure walking towards them.

"Good evening, dearies," the person greeted in a scratchy, witch-like voice. She then cackled, making the similarity complete. "Can I help you kids?"

"Like, we were just leaving!"

"Reah!" Both Hunk and Allura tried to make a break for it, but were held back by Pidge.

"Hold on, you two fraidy cats," he scolded.

"We're not cats," Allura protested, laughing nervously. "We're chickens!"

"Brack buck buck buck!"

"Cut it out, you guys," Keith warned. "Sorry we're coming here so late, ma'am, but we were wondering if we could use your filling station. We've run out of gas, and we have a flat tire."

The woman again cackled. "Well, my helping hand could certainly fix up that tire. But, I'm afraid you'll have to wait till the morning for gas. Our pumps are dry, and we have to wait for the tanker."

"Oh boy. Well...um, do you have any room to put up some travelers? That is, if it's not too much trouble."

The woman laughed a third time and pointed a long, green, bony finger up. Above them was a large wooden sign: HAGAR’S BED AND BREAKFAST.

--------------

The Voltron Mystery 3

The inside of the house was not much better than the outside. In fact, it was worse. Cobwebs covered the broken-down chairs and tables. Filthy curtains hung like torn rags across the cracked windows. "Wipe your feet," the owner warned. "I just vacuumed and dusted the place."

"Yeah. With REAL dust," Allura whispered to Hunk.

"I'll get my helper to show you to your rooms." As Keith filled out the registration book, the old woman pushed a button on the wall. All waited in silence for a moment. Hagar impatiently drummed her fingers. "That crazy...ZARK!!" she snapped loudly. "HEY ZARK!! GET IN HERE, YOU OLD FOOL!!"

"Yeah...yeah," came a voice outside. Soon, the door swung open, and in strode a tall and rather stout blue-skinned man.

Hagar shook her head. "It's all you can get over here," she told the gang apologetically. "This is Mr. Zarkon. He comes from a nearby farm and helps out from time to time." Stained overalls, work boots, and straw hat helped confirm the woman's statement.

The man eyed the group menacingly. "What are all them daggum kids doin' here?" he said in a "hicksville" accent, completing his appearance.

"They're guests. Now, get these keys, and show them upstairs."

"Shoot, woman! It's the middle of the..."

"NOW, you old goat!" She slammed the keys in his hand.

"Yeah...yeah." Mr. Zarkon slowly started to lumber up the nearby staircase.

"Good night, kids," Hagar yelled up. "And Zark! After you get back down, you gotta check the tire on their vehicle!"

"Yeah...yeah."

* * *

"There are two rooms here," Mr. Zarkon mumbled. "You can decide who gits what."

"Thank you, sir," Keith said.

"Yeah...just make sure y'all lock them doors and windas."

"Lock our doors and windows?" Lance questioned. "But, why?"

Mr. Zarkon leered at the young man. "Cause if'n you don't...the phantom robeasts'll git ya."

*GULP!* "Rantom robeast???" Hunk started to whimper.

"Phantom robeast?" Pidge snorted. "That's silly! There's no such thing as ghosts!"

"Oh yeah?" Zarkon shifted his weight, making the floor boards creak. "Years ago, this here house was built on an ol' robeast burial ground. They say them critters could tear 'part a barn wi' one claw." He raised his hand and swiped the air. Both Allura and Hunk had grabbed hold of each other, shivering in fright. "Strange things been happenin' here. I even seen 'em once. Two of 'em. Scared my hoss 'n my boy." Zarkon spit to the side, wiped his hands on his overalls, then turned to leave. "'night, y'all."

"Ho ho boy! First creepy old ladies, now GHOSTS!"

"Calm down, Allura," Pidge declared, "He's probably just trying to scare us." Just then, an ear-piercing scream was heard downstairs.

"ZOINKS!!" Allura screamed out as her hair stood up on end. "Like, he's doing a good job, too!!"

"That sounded like Ms. Hagar, Keithy!"

"It sure did, Lance. Come on gang! Let's check it out!"

* * *

Back downstairs, the gang could find nobody. "MS. HAGAR!"

"MS. HAGAR!"

"Like, no one's here. Let's split!"

"No you don't, Allura. We've got to find Ms. Hagar."

"Hey Keithy!" Lance yelled. "Look at this!" He pointed to the registration book. He read out the newly written words: "'Get out while you still can!' And it's signed 'The Phantom Robeasts!'"

"Jinkies!" Pidge remarked. "Ms. Hagar must have been kidnapped!"

"Yeah, and by ghosts!"

"There are no such things, Allura!" Pidge began to search where Ms. Hagar was standing; behind the counter. "Hey! Look here!" He indicated long tracks on the dusty floor. "That was where she was. From the looks of these marks, she must have been dragged away by someone."

"But, those tracks lead straight into a wall," Lance protested. "How could she be dragged through a wall?"

"Like, you got me there," Allura declared as she leaned against the wall with her elbow. "YOW!!" Suddenly, the wall panel rotated, causing Allura to crash to the ground.

"A secret passage!"

"Way to go, Allura!" Keith praised. "You did it again!"

"Like just my luck," Allura grumbled.

"But look!" Through the wall and ahead a little ways were two long tunnels. "Which one did they go through?"

"I don't know." Keith took a deep breath. "You know what that means?"

"We split up!" replied the rest of the gang.

"Right! Lance? You and Pidge search...OWW!" He rubbed his arm where Lance had pinched him. "I...I mean you and I will take the right tunnel. Pidge, Allura, and Hunk will take the left."

"LIKE NOOOO WAY!!" Allura protested. "You want us to go from some spooky house to an even spookier tunnel!"

"Reah!"

"Hunk and I are staying here," Allura declared.

Keith dug into his pocket. "Would you do it for a Voltron snack?" he asked, holding up a small cookie-like object.

"Like UH-UH! You can't fool us with that old routine!"

"Okay...how about two Voltron snacks?"

Allura and Hunk pretended to be in deep thought. "Well..."

"Three Voltron snacks?"

"Yeahyeahyeahyeahyeahyeahyeah!" Hunk said excitedly.

"Hold it, Keith," Pidge spoke up. "Just what are you doing? Don't you know that these so called 'snacks' are in reality a symbolic representation of a mind altering..."

"Oh, chill out, Pidge," Keith said as he tossed the Voltron snacks into the air. "They're just a type of cookie." Then, he and Lance started off towards the right. To the left, Pidge shook his head in disgust as the pair ahead of him stumbled around singing, "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Voltron Mystery 4

The passage ahead and behind them was dark and creepy. The only sounds heard were the drip of water and the squeak of space mice. Allura and Hunk both walked on tiptoe as the three proceeded on their path.

Pidge raised his hand, signaling the other two to stop. "A ladder," he said as he pointed up with his finger. "And look where it leads." Above them were small cracks of light shining through what appeared to be floorboards.

"Like, orange sock-wearers first," Allura told Pidge with a grin. Pidge just huffed and started to climb.

"Hey! It’s a barn."

"Row!" Hunk exclaimed. After Pidge had pushed aside the trap door, the three found themselves enveloped by the smell of hay. It looked like a huge storage room with all types of feed, wood chips, farm tools, and storage bins.

"Hmm. Very interesting." Pidge put his hand on his chin in thought. "Thismust be part of Mr. Zarkon’s farm. But, why would the passage lead here? And where was he when Ms. Hagar was abducted?" He looked around the room. "There’s a large door over there. Allura? You check in there while Hunk and I search this area for clues."

"Like do I have to?" Allura whined.

"Yes, Allura. Unless you want to go hunting outside in the dark and spooky storm."

"All right. I get the picture." The princess started nervously towards the door.

"Don’t worry, Allura," Pidge reassured her. "We’ll be right next door if you need anything. Just yell."

"Don’t worry, I will!" With that, Allura slowly opened the door and walked out of sight.

In the next room, Allura found what appeared to be a stable, but it was too dark to tell. She heard what sounded like horses and could make out some stalls. She moved cautiously, her hands pressed against the wall. "Hello?" she whispered in a shaky voice. She felt a horseshoe under her fingers. "Like anybody here?" She took another step forward...right into a metal bucket.

CLANG! CLANG! Allura yelped in surprise and shook her foot violently, trying to dislodge the bucket. Finally, it went flying off her foot, hitting a nearby stall, which caused a horse to whinny.

"Who’s thar?" came a faraway voice. The princess heard another door creak open. She quickly dove into a large barrel. The lights in the room came on. "Shelia? You silly hoss. What ails ya, girl?" Footsteps started towards the stall door on which the bucket had landed. Allura gulped and shivered, trying not to make a sound as the person came ever closer.

But, a peep had escaped her lips. And, the person had heard it. "Someone...here?" Allura crouched even lower in the barrel, shutting her eyes tight in fear. Then, she felt something cold slither down her neck.

"AAHHH!" She quickly jumped up and found herself face to face with...the most gorgeous farm boy she had ever seen. His short-sleeved flannel shirt showed off his powerful arms, while the undone top buttons revealed his strong chest. His faded jeans, with a tear over one knee, lay tight against his muscles. His long white hair was pulled back in a ponytail, his head covered with a straw hat.

His smooth, blue-skinned and handsome face displayed both surprise and amusement. He raised his hat slightly in greeting. "Well, now. You sure is the purtiest little trespasser I ever seen." His white teeth flashed in a huge grin. "You just lucky that thar water barrel wasn’t fulled up."

Allura looked around to see the dripping spigot behind her. When she turned back, she was again caught speechless by the sight of the young man. Her eyes drifted down, then up. "Uh...like...uh..."

"Hi, miss," he said, extending his hand. "I’m Lotor."

"L...Allura...uh..."

"Allura," he purred. "Very nice." Quickly, he scooped her out of the barrel and held her in both arms.

"Hey! Like put me down!" Allura began to squirm.

"And feisty, too." He then kissed her full on the lips. He pulled away reluctantly. "Damn! You is fine," he crooned.

"Now...now, let’s not rush into anything." She again tried to dislodge herself from his arms and succeeded in falling to the ground. He made a grab for her, but Allura scurried away on her hands and knees, heading under a wooden table.

But, Lotor was crawling right behind her. "You is a city girl, right?" he asked, excitedly. "I never known a city girl."

Allura ran around to the other side of the table, with Lotor in hot pursuit. She feigned running one direction, then headed the other. But, he kept after her, causing a stalemate between the two. "Like control yourself!" she pleaded.

"I could learn you country fun," he told her. Lotor then jumped up and slid across the table to the other side. He held Allura tightly in his arms. "Like rollin’ in the hay."

"BOY!!" came a new booming voice. "BOY, WHAR IS YA??!! WHY AINT YOU DONE SLOPPED THEM HAWGS TODAY??!!"

Lotor whipped around, surprised then annoyed. "AWW, PAW!!" he whined.

"DAGNAB IT, BOY!" The figure of Mr. Zarkon appeared inside the room, quickly approaching Lotor. "If you wasn’t my son..."

"But Paw, I is busy! I got me a girl!"

"I done told ya to quit that thar lady chasin’!"

"Paw, she’s real purty, though! An’ I gonna get hitched to...whar is she?" Lotor just realized that Allura had made a break for the other room. "She was just thar!"

Mr. Zarkon shook his head. "Y’all been in my still again, boy?"

"No, Paw!"

"Git out, an’ slop them hawgs!"

"Aww, Paw!"

"You ain’t too big to be whupped!" Zarkon warned. "Now, GIT afore I tan yer hide!"

--------------

The Voltron Mystery 5

In the next room, another saga was being played out. Pidge had just told Hunk to sniff out some clues. So, he scoured the storage room, his nose bent to the ground, while Pidge hunted through various bins.

"Hmm..." Pidge’s voice came from one corner of the room. "Here’s something one would definitely not expect in a room full of feed."

"Rhat’s that, Ridge?" Hunk questioned, his ears perking up.

Pidge’s head and arms emerged from a barrel. "It looks like someone was trying to get rid of some evidence." In his hands were shredded pieces of paper. "And, from the quality of the parchment, I’d calculate that this is the remains of a telegram. Yep!" He had just arranged three scraps to spell out the words in large blue letters. "Help me get the rest of the paper, Hunk."

"Rokay!"

Hunk reached his long arms into the barrel as Pidge tried to make sense of what was in his hands. "Let’s see... ‘CORD TO ILL LUR OLIR?’ I’m still missing lots of paper, Hunk."

"Rere, Ridge." Hunk deposited some more paper into Pidge’s hand. "Rhat’s it!"

"Good. Now, let me have some space." Hunk, who was leaning over Pidge, watching his work, straightened up to give him room. It was then that he looked up...and turned pure white.

"Rrrridge?" Hunk gulped and began to whimper.

"Not now, Hunk. I’m busy."

"Rrrr..." His eyes were as wide as saucers now, and he was shaking right down to his feet. For, in front of him was the most vile, hideous, evil looking entity that could ever have been created by witchcraft. The thing stood a good seven feet high and was blood red. It had enormous fangs and at least four sets of eyes. Its fingers were chainsaws, its toes axes. It had a huge serpentine tail which lashed back and forth. And, its entire demonic form had an eerie, unearthly glow surrounding it.

"RRRAAAAUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!"

"RIIIIIIIIIIIIIKES!!!!" Hunk flew from the monster so fast that he caught Pidge with his right arm, knocking the boy sideways.

"HEY!!" And also knocking off his glasses. "My glasses! I can’t see a thing without my glasses!" Pidge felt around the floor like a blind man as Hunk dove for the nearest cover; three empty storage bins.

The ghostly robeast seemed only interested in the fleeing one. It ran to the storage bins, knowing that Hunk lay in the middle one. But, as it peered in, it realized the bin was empty. Just then, Hunk’s head popped out of the left bin. The monster growled in disgust and headed for this bin. But, as soon as Hunk’s head disappeared and the monster looked in, he was again gone. Then, Hunk’s head popped out of the right bin. Then the left...right...center...right...center...right...left... The creature howled in anger, smashing all three bins. Hunk lay trapped in the corner of the room, crying in a puppy-like voice. It looked like nothing could help him!

It was at this time, Allura had escaped her country lover boy and raced towards that very room. When she saw the ominous beast looming over her friend, she let out the familiar "ZOINKS!!!"

"RRUUURRRAAAAA!!!!!!" Hunk screamed. "RRRRREEEELLLLLLPPPP!!!!"

"HANG ON, HUNK!" What can I do??? she thought frantically. Her fearful eyes suddenly lit up. She snapped her fingers and smiled.

Then, she walked straight up to the robeast. "Gooood evening, sir. Such a wonderful it is today, sir. How are you today? Welcome to Allura’s Shoe Store. If we can’t find the shoe, it isn’t worth wearing." All this was said in a very fast saleswoman voice as she led the monster to a nearby box. "Now, just sit down, sir, and we’ll measure your foot for the newest, coolest, hippest, and most comfortable footwear you could ever imagine." From out of nowhere, Allura pulled out a foot measure. "SIZE EIGHTEEN AND THREE EIGHTHS!!" she yelled out.

"RIZE RIEGHTEEN AND REE REIGHTHS!!" Hunk echoed as he pulled out a pair of large horseshoes. These he handed off to Allura, along with a hammer and nails.

"Let’s just slip these on, sir." With lightning speed, Allura hammered the horseshoes to the robeast’s feet. "Now, if you’ll walk around in them, sir, we can see if they fit comfortably."

The robeast stood up and walked cautiously, pivoting around and observing itself in the full-length mirror that Allura also made miraculously appear from thin air. Meanwhile, Hunk was busy heating up another pair of horseshoes inside the Instant Blacksmith Furnace 4000. When they were red hot, he gave Allura a wink. "And, if you don’t like this, sir, we do have another very hot item..." She quickly stepped aside as Hunk charged the robeast with the horseshoes.

"YOOOOOOWWWWW!!!" The robeast flew thirty feet straight up in the air, clutching his rear end in pain.

"Great job Hunk! Now, let’s split!!" Both of them headed straight for the hidden tunnel. That is, before they realized they were leaving someone behind.

"Allura? Is that you?" Pidge squinted at the phantom robeast, who was still rubbing its sore behind.

"ARRRRARRARRR!!!" the beast howled.

"Gosh, Allura! You sound awful! Did you get the space flu? Here..." He reached into a pocket to pull out a bottle and a spoon. "Here’s some leftover medicine from when Lance and I had the flu. Drink it up."

"RAAGGGARRRAAGGG!!!"

"Now quit complaining! I know it tastes bad, but you have to take it!" He shoved the spoon into the monster’s mouth, causing it to convulse violently.

"LIKE PIDGE!!" Allura seized the moment to race for the near-sighted team member.

"See?" Pidge proclaimed. "You sound better already!"

"Put these on!" Allura reached into her pocket for the spare pair of glasses that Pidge made her carry.

"Oh! Thanks, Allura! That’s much...JINKIES!!!!"

"Now, like LET’S GET OUT OF HERE!!!" Pidge paused only long enough to grab the pieces of paper before following the others in a mad rush to the tunnel.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Voltron Mystery 6

While the others had their fun, Keith and Lance proceeded along the right tunnel path. So far, they had stumbled across nothing, as usual, and were rather bored. "You know what, Lance?" Keith’s voice broke through the silence. "I kind of like you better with red hair."

"You think so?" Lance ran his fingers through some loose strands and giggled slightly. "Golly, thanks! You know, you look swell with blond hair, too."

"Aww, shucks!" Keith blushed and scuffed his feet a little at the compliment. "It’s not really..." Just then, a moan permeated the air.

"CREEPERS!" Lance declared. "What was that, Keithy?!"

"I don’t know, Lance. But, it seems to be coming from somewhere ahead of us." The two proceeded cautiously down the tunnel.

"I see a light!" Lance pointed out.

"Yeah. I think it’s a room." Keith was right. They stepped into a large open area. "But, what is this place?" All around, enormous metallic cylinders lay on their sides with pipes attached along their surfaces. A slight hum was heard in the background.

"Eww. Someone sure has dirty shoes." Lance picked up his foot in disgust.

"Hey! Wait a minute..." Keith knelt to study the black footprint that Lance had stepped on. He traced a finger through the gunk. "This is oil!" he declared.

"Oil? But, what’s oil doing in here?"

"Look! This other set of footprints over here is tracking gasoline!" He pointed along the floor.

"Boy, whoever they are, they sure have big feet," Lance said nervously. "I wonder if it’s..." Then the moaning was heard again.

"It’s coming from over here!" Keith called out, pointing to a door. He turned the knob and tugged. "It’s...it’s stuck. Lance? Give me a hand, will you?" Lance wrapped his arms around Keith’s waist, and both of them pulled. The door finally gave way, throwing both to the floor. When they got up, they were greeted with the sight of...

"MS. HAGAR!!"

"MMM...nmnmnnn....Mmmm!!" The old woman struggled against the ropes binding her. Keith ran inside to free her.

"Who did this to you?!" he questioned as he removed the gag.

"I don’t know," Ms. Hagar screeched. "I was just standing there, and suddenly, I was grabbed, blindfolded, and dragged away through a tunnel! Then, they threw me into this room..."

"They? Then, there was more than one person?"

"There were two of them, I think. Though I don’t know if you could call them people." She smoothed out her wrinkled robes with a hand. "Their hands felt like metal."

"We’ll get you back to your house, Ms. Hagar," Lance offered.

"No. No, wait...I know this place!" Hagar now looked around the huge room. "Yes! This is the storage bay for the filling station! I’ve only been down here a few times. Zark is the one who usually deals with refueling and stuff." She pointed at one of the cylinders. "These things are where the fuel is held."

"That explains the footprints," Keith mumbled. "You say Mr. Zarkon comes down here often?"

"Oh yes. He is the one that...you know, that is funny." Ms. Hagar paused to think. "He said that the tanks were filled just yesterday. We haven’t had many customers. So, why did they run out today?"

"I think I know," Lance declared from near one cylinder. He was bent over a small contraption that led off from one of the pipes. It was still running, and gasoline dripped from one loose connection. The remaining gasoline was being pumped by the device into a floor drain.

Hagar’s eyes went wide. "Those monstrous toads!" she snapped.

"Well, I’d certainly call this an important finding," Keith summed up. "Now, let’s get you back to the house." But, no one was going anywhere. For, at that moment, a secret wall slid back into place, cutting off the entrance to the tunnel. And, in front of that wall, a ghastly blue and glowing creature laughed in triumph.

--------------

The Voltron Mystery 7

A colossal gleaming blue monster stood in front of the three onlookers. Its hideous reptilian face grinned, showing sharp fangs and a forked tongue. On its hands, sparks shot out of the fingertips. On its head was mounted a whirring drill.

Even Keith, the most level-headed and courageous of the gang was white with fright. "Ddddo you see what I see?" he asked the others in a soft voice.

"I’m affffraid so, sonny," Ms. Hagar whispered in response.

"Sssss..." the robeast hissed. "Now, I have you! And you will NEVER esssscape!!!"

"Wanna bet?" Lance countered. As quickly as he could, he seized Ms. Hagar’s and Keith’s hands and took off running, just as the villain made a swipe at the three.

* * *

Pidge, Allura and Hunk ran through the tunnel, too scared to look behind them. "Quick! Let’s head for the second passage!" Pidge suggested. "We can meet up with the others and tell them what we found!"

"Like if we make it that far," Allura whimpered. For then, she had just heard the growl of the phantom robeast as it followed them through the tunnel. "Faster, Hunk! It’s gaining on us!"

"Roh no!!"

* * *

For some unknown reason, the underground storage room had a hallway full of closed doors on one end. Lance raced for the corridor, opening one door for the others, then slamming it shut. The robeast pursued them, entering the same door.

On the other side of the hall, a door flew open, and a lone Keith hurried out, heading for another door across the way.

Meanwhile, Lance burst out of a door near the back of the hallway. Leading Ms. Hagar by the hand, the two headed for a door near the front.

The robeast soon rushed out of the same door it had gone in and went into the door adjacent it.

Then, Keith tore out of that same door, followed by Lance.

Then, Ms. Hagar exited a door being led by Keith.

Then, the robeast came out a door led by Lance, who soon realized the mistake and ran the opposite direction back into the door from which they both had departed.

Keith came out on top of Lance’s shoulders.

Ms. Hagar came out on Lance’s shoulders.

The robeast came out on Ms. Hagar’s shoulders.

Keith and Lance came out on the robeast’s shoulders.

All came out of different doors, heading for a mid-hall collision. But, they stopped just before impact, screamed, and ran out of the hallway.

Unfortunately for our heroes, the three ended up trapped against the wall where the tunnel entrance used to be. "Quick!" Keith shouted. "See if you can find a trigger mechanism!" They all frantically felt across the wall, but it was in vain. The robeast knew this and laughed evilly.

"Now, I have you!" The demon ran towards the three, roaring in triumph. Yet, suddenly, the wall slid aside, causing Lance, Keith and Ms. Hagar to fall backwards into the tunnel. Three sets of hands quickly grabbed them, pulling them to the side. As the blue robeast growled in confusion, still running towards the tunnel, the red robeast shrieked in alarm as it ran out of the tunnel. Both ghosts collided just outside the secret passage.

"Like are we glad to see you!" came a familiar voice.

"Allura!" Lance declared with joy. "Golly! That was a close one!"

"Shut the wall!"

"Will do!" Pidge pulled on a lever, and the wall slid back into place, much to the dismay of the two phantoms.

"Okay, gang," Keith resumed his leadership role as he stood up and brushed his pants. "Let’s head back to the house! Who knows when those two will recover and come back after us!" With that, the group ran through the tunnel, passing the same broken board and unlit candle in the background about ten times before reaching the original false wall that led into the lobby. All sighed in relief. They were safe, for now...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Voltron Mystery 8

"Okay, gang," Keith said in an exhausted voice, as he plopped into a very dusty chair. "Now that we’re all here, we can share what we’ve found out about these ghosts."

"Well," Pidge started out, "we discovered that our side of the tunnel led into Mr. Zarkon’s barn. And, we also found these scraps of paper from a torn-up telegram." He pulled out the taped pieces. "But, I can’t decipher it. There are still some missing pieces."

Keith took the paper and studied it. "Hmm...it does add to the mystery. Allura? Did you find...what is that stuff on your hands?!"

"Huh?" Allura looked down. "Like wow! They’re glowing, aren’t they?"

Pidge grabbed the princess’ wrist and took a closer look at her lustrous fingertips. "It’s phosphorescent paint!" he exclaimed. "And look! There’s some on the backs of Keith’s legs. And Lance’s too! And on Ms. Hagar’s shoulders!"

"That’s every place the robeast touched us," Keith explained.

"And like I had touched that creepy thing when Hunk and I played blacksmiths," Allura added.

"Reah! And rave him a rot seat!" Hunk chuckled at the memory.

"So, that was why there was a ‘W’ burned into the red robeast’s behind!" Lance deduced.

As Keith then told the three about their findings in the storage room, a strange rattling came from the front door. When a loud banging followed, Hunk and Allura howled in terror and immediately dove under the floor rug. The others didn’t look any less scared.

"It’s ppprobbably the robeasts, Kkkeithy," Lance stammered out.

"We better find places to hide," Pidge suggested.

"No...hang on, kids." Hagar was crouching near a window and peering through a tear in the drawn curtains. Her expression was becoming much calmer. She soon stood up and headed for the front door.

"Like ARE YOU CRAZY?!!" Allura screamed from under the rug.

"Relax!" With that, the door was opened, revealing the blue farmer. "Zark!" Hagar rebuked him, her hands on her hips. "What are you doing here? You nearly gave us a fright!"

"Yes, what are you doing here?" Keith echoed, his voice indicating suspicion.

"Shoot! Don’t all act so funny-like," he exclaimed. "I just come to ask fer the key to the fuel room."

"You’re very absent-minded!" Hagar scorned. "You know very well you have a key, just like I do!"

"But, I caint find the durn thang!" he yelled back. "It’s done gone!"

"More like you lost it," Hagar snorted.

"I DID NOT! Pro’bly that boy o’ mine done it."

"What do you need it for?" Hagar moved towards the front desk and opened a side drawer.

"I gots me their new wheel in my tractor. But, it done run out a gas on me. So, I come to the pumps, but they don’t work none."

Hagar, who was holding the key out in her hand, slammed it on the desk in exasperation. "You old fool! They’re empty!"

"Naw, they probably aint hooked up right. I just had them filled not..."

"They are empty!" Hagar insisted.

Mr. Zarkon stared at the old woman in disbelief. "But..." He finally gave up. His shoulders slumped as he admitted defeat. "All right," he grumbled angrily. "I’ll get that boy out of them hawgs an’ over to help me carry that wheel." He stomped towards the door.

"What’s he doing with the hogs?" Hagar asked in confusion.

"Aw, I told him to slop them hawgs an’ he don’t all..."

"ZARK, even I know that you don’t slop hogs in the middle of the night!!"

"WOMAN, DON’T Y’ALL TELL ME HOW TO LEARN MY BOY!! I’LL..." Mr. Zarkon slammed the door, cutting off his remaining words.

"Crazy old fart," Ms. Hagar scoffed. as she returned to a dusty chair.

Keith soon got the group back on track. "Well gang, all these clues lead to one conclusion:" He stood up with dramatic flare. "Those two ghosts are NOT ghosts at all!"

"Like that’s supposed to make us feel better?" Allura whined. "That instead of ghost robeasts, those are REAL robeasts?!!"

"BUT, since they aren’t ghosts, that means we can capture them!"

"Oh no..."

"Now, Allura," Keith coaxed. "Don’t worry! I have a plan! But first, we’ll need to get over to that barn..."

--------------

The Voltron Mystery 9

"That should do it!" Keith brushed off his hands and proudly surveyed his latest, and grossly overdone monster-catching device. He walked over to a low-lying strand of taut rope. "Now, when the monsters trip on this rope, they’ll fall against that large wooden crate." He pointed to the beginning of the trap. "That, in turn, will activate the rest of the contraption and BINGO! We’ve snagged our two colorful ghosts!"

Pidge looked over the plan, his hands on his hips. "Well, I’ll admit it, Keith; you’ve really outdone yourself this time. But, how are we going to get the robeasts to come into the barn and run through this exact spot?"

"Like how else?" Allura groaned. "He’ll get Hunk and me to act as bait and lure them here."

Keith gave a false look of surprise. "Why, Allura!" he exclaimed. "How generous of you to volunteer!"

As Hunk began to cry uncontrollably, Allura conked herself on the head. "Why do I even bother?!" she moaned.

* * *

"Now, remember you two: run through the tunnel, into the barn, and JUMP OVER the rope! DON’T run into it like the last..."

"Rall RIGHT!!" Hunk declared. "Reesh! One rittle mistrake..."

"We’ll be waiting for you near the trap," Pidge told them. "Remember to yell when you’re about to enter the barn."

"Like don’t worry," Allura chuckled. "That we can do!"

"Good luck, you guys," Lance wished the two chickens as they climbed into the dark tunnel. When they were out of sight, Lance turned to Pidge. "Do you think it’ll work?" he asked.

"Don’t worry," Pidge assured him. "That telegram will be like a magnet to those metallic monsters. Which reminds me: I should hunt for the rest of the pieces."

Keith looked absent-mindedly around the barn. "Gosh, this is a big place. I wonder why one of the tunnels leads here to the farm."

Ms. Hagar shook her head. "I have no idea. When I bought the house, nobody told me about these secret passageways."

"Do you think Mr. Zarkon knows about these tunnels?"

Ms. Hagar shrugged. "Beats me, kiddo."

"He sure has been acting peculiar."

"Naaa!" she scoffed. "Zark’s always been losing his marbles."

* * *

Meanwhile, the red and blue glowing robeasts slithered down the passageways; growling, snorting, gurgling, and making other normal monster sounds. Suddenly, the two stopped in their tracks and listened intently.

"GOSH, HUNK," Allura was saying in a very exaggerated acting tone. "Look at this STRANGE PAPER!!"

"ROW!" Hunk declared in mock astonishment. The two villains silently crept up to get a closer look at the talkers.

"It looks like a TELEGRAM!" Allura continued. "GEE!! I wonder what it says!"

The blue robeast turned to its partner in fury. "SSS!!! I thought you got rid of that paper!" it hissed. The red creature looked as astonished at the news as the blue one. "Let’ssss get it!"

"Like that’s our cue," Allura told Hunk as she and he took off running, the monsters close behind.

* * *

Keith, Pidge, and Ms. Hagar were safely hidden behind sacks of feed while Lance continued to listen at the trap door. "Lance!" Keith warned. "Get over here, and hide!"

"Just a minute," Lance insisted. "I hear something." Which was true, for at that moment, a long "heeelllllllllp!" permeated the room. "I think they’re coming!"

"Get over here, silly!" Pidge demanded. But, it was too late. The trap door flung open, and two terrified persons scrambled out of the tunnel, crashing straight into Lance.

"‘Danger-prone Lance’ does it again," Keith announced sadly as Pidge groaned and shook his head. Fortunately, the colliding three fell to the ground before they could trip over the rope and trigger Keith’s monster-trap. Unfortunately, the robeasts also stopped before hitting the rope.

The blue creature turned to face the heap of bodies on the floor. Its large drill began to whir with alarming speed. "Give me that PAPER!" it howled as it lunged forward. The three quickly rolled out of the way, causing the monster to drill its head into the floor. While the red robeast struggled to free its companion, Lance, Allura, and Hunk scrambled madly for hiding places.

Allura, in a moment of panic, shoved the telegram into Hunk’s hands and raced towards the door leading to the horse stalls. Thinking twice, she located a stack of boxes and hid behind them. Little did she know that the door, just to the left of her, began to slowly open. As she sat, her knees tucked to her chest and shivering in fear, a large hand emerged from the doorway. As it grabbed hold of her arm, Allura only had time to scream before she was pulled out of the room and the door was shut.

"RRURA?!!" Hunk barked in concern. He turned towards the scream, but saw no one. "She’s RISSAPEARED!!" he cried to Lance.

"And sssso will you," the blue robeast warned, "if you don’t give usss that PAPER!" Lance and Hunk were slowly forced backwards and towards the opposite wall, where another large barn door was open to the outside. They saw the door and tried to make a run for it, but the two robeasts quickly raced ahead and blocked their escape. The monsters leered gleefully at their captors. "Now, the PAPER!!"

Too bad they didn’t notice a dark shadow just outside the door. The silhouette of a hoe was seen in the shadow’s hand. With one quick swipe, the shade struck both robeasts solid on their heads.

The force of the blow sent both monsters reeling into the center of the barn and, as luck would have it, straight into the large wooden crate (GEE! What are the odds???). As the crate tilted over, the trap was sprung:

The weight of the crate snapped a small piece of string attached to the top of the crate.

The upper part of the string, since it was threaded around a small pulley and hooked to a horseshoe, zipped up.

Meanwhile, the horseshoe fell down fell onto a makeshift seesaw, which caused a milk bottle on the other end to fly through the air.

The milk bottle crashed on a small wooden table, soaking the table with milk.

Small droplets of milk fell off the unleveled table and into a thimble perched on a small switch.

The thimble, since it became heavier with the milk, clicked the switch on an upside-down rapid hay-baler.

As the hay bales came out of the top part (thus the bottom) of the machine, the machine lifted off the ground, heading for the barn ceiling.

On the ceiling was a hand-held bellows device, which sent out a thin, but powerful stream of air as the hay-baler machine compressed it.

The stream of air blew a paper airplane off of a wooden ledge and down towards a balloon.

Since the airplane had a small pin on its nose, it popped the balloon on contact, causing a small sack, which had been resting on the balloon, to fall to the ground.

*To make a long story short, I’ll just tell you that this sort of stuff continued for at least half an hour until finally...*

The match on the pendulum swung down and across a piece of sandpaper, thus igniting it.

The lit match then swung up towards a piece of rope, that was immediately caught on fire and burned through.

Since the rope held a large fishing net up in the air, the net cascaded to the ground and over the two dazed robeasts. With growls of anger and cheers of delight, the monsters were thus captured!

But, where was Allura?

And who was that mysterious shadow?

And WHO ARE THE ROBEASTS REALLY???

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Somewhat suggestive situations

The Voltron Mystery 10

"Well, that was certainly a fortuitous series of events," Pidge remarked as Keith and Lance finished tying up the two robeasts.

"And now," Keith declared, reaching for the top of the blue robeast’s head, "to find out who these two creeps REALLY are." Then, to make the suspense even more unbearable, he decided to add his own theory. "And, if I’m right," he started out, "one of these must be Mr. Zarkon!"

"I agree," Lance added. "Who else could it be? And, he sure acted strange around us. That tunnel also led straight to his farm."

The clicking of Pidge’s tongue against his teeth in a "tut-tut" fashion was heard. "I hate to disappoint you guys, but I highly doubt it was Mr. Zarkon." With his right hand, he was taping in the remaining three pieces to complete the telegram.

"Say what?" came a familiar voice. All of the group whipped towards the forgotten shadowy figure as it stepped through the door. "Who done call me?"

"MR. ZARKON!!!" Keith, Lance, Hunk, and Pidge proclaimed in surprise. For there was the farmer; hoe in hand and definitely not in a robeast costume.

"I hear a bunch o’ noise in here an’ come in with my hoe." He swiped the air in demonstration. "I seen’em an’ whacked’em good!" he finished proudly.

Keith stared on in confusion. "Well...uh...then, one of these two MUST be Mr. Zarkon’s son!"

"My BOY?!!" Mr. Zarkon questioned in astonishment. Then, he started calling for his missing son in a booming voice that made the floorboards vibrate.

"You see???" Keith explained excitedly. "His son isn’t here! He’s got to be one of them!" He looked at Pidge for encouragement but only saw the young man slowly shake his head.

"BOY!!! WHAR IS YA??!!!"

"What’s all that noise???" came another new voice. All heads turned towards the opposite wall and the closed door, which now opened to reveal...

"RRUURRRAAAAA!!!!" Hunk jumped up and ran to hug his safe, but rather shabby-looking friend. "Rhat happened?"

"Well..." Allura smoothed out her rumpled green shirt and pulled a piece of straw out of her untidy hair. "I...uh, thought I found another clue," she remarked.

"BUT WHAR’S MY BOY???!!!" Mr. Zarkon continued to yell.

Pidge now joined Hunk in questioning. "Where exactly was this clue?" he asked, looking her over.

"Oh, up in the hayloft," she told him with a giggle.

"BOY!!!!"

"I’M RIGHT HERE, PAW!!!" came a loud response, at last, to Mr. Zarkon’s shouts. The young and handsome farm boy came through the same doorway as Allura and stood right behind her. He quickly scanned the new crowd of people. "Howdy," he told them cheerfully.

Allura looked at Pidge, then at Lotor and blushed a deep red. "Like, a big clue," she murmured along with another giggle as Lotor pushed back stray white hairs and removed some more straw from his mane.

Keith was very confused by now. "Who are they, then?!"

"Well, don’t look at me," Ms. Hagar cackled, "I’m not in one of those suits!"

"Naw, you wouldn’t fit," Mr. Zarkon remarked, causing Ms. Hagar to race after him in anger.

Pidge deftly strode over to the blue robeast, lightly pushing Keith aside. "I know who the real culprits are," he told everyone in the room. "And this one is none other than..." He pulled off the mask. "Ta da!"

"PRINCESS ROMELLE!!" Sure enough. There she was; the cousin to Allura, with a grisly sneer on her face.

"But, like why, Romelle?" Allura questioned in shock.

"Rrrrgghhh..." was the only reply.

"I can tell you, Allura," Pidge offered. "It seems that there was more to this will-reading than meets the eye. As is shown by this intercepted telegram:" He held up the reconstructed paper for Allura to read while he spoke. "‘ACCORDING TO UNCLE’S WILL, ALLURA IS SOLE HEIR OF FORTUNE. -SIGNED: GARRISON & GARRISON LAWYERS INC.’ And, it was meant to arrive on Arus along with your cousin’s letter." Pidge now looked at Romelle. "I take it that you received word of a possible exception to this agreement?"

"Yeah, I did," she spat. "I received a telegram, saying that I wouldn’t get a dime! But, it also said that if Allura was informed of the will and didn’t show up on Pollux within forty-eight hours, the ENTIRE fortune would go to me!"

"So, you stole your cousin’s telegram and wrote your own letter, as well as enclosing a false map for a ‘short cut’ to Pollux."

"I knew that stupid leader, Keith wouldn’t put enough gas in Voltron," she snapped. "I just had you go around in circles till you ran empty and had to land here."

Lance, who was silently putting two and two together now spoke up. "Then, you drained the gas station and any other gas tanks, like Mr. Zarkon’s tractor, to keep us from being able to get off the planet! But, we could have left tomorrow, you know; with the tanker coming by in the morning."

Romelle laughed evilly. "No, you wouldn’t," she countered. "I know you guys can’t pass up a good mystery. I had PLANNED to keep chasing you around for at least three more days! But, this MORON next to me messed it all up when he didn’t get rid of that telegram!"

"That’s right!" Keith suddenly declared. "We don’t know who the other robeast is." He then began to tug off the red creature’s mask.

"Really, Keith," Romelle scolded. "Can’t you guess who it is?"

Just then, the mask came off. "SVEN!!!" everyone gasped in astonishment.

"Ya," came a grumbled response.

"But...but why?!" Keith managed to say.

"Because I’m seek und tired of always being in de background!" he complained. "In de Yapanese yersion, I DIE! In de American yersion, I’m yust a stupid second-rate character! I WANNA BE IN DE MAIN CHARACTERS AGAIN!" Sven then began to sob.

"And, with all the money and Allura’s forthcoming embarrassment, I could have made us both costars of ‘Voltron!’" Romelle exclaimed.

"Ya!" Sven sniffled. "If it weren’t for you meddling keids!!"

* * *

Later, the kids had met at the Arus malt shop. "You know, I feel kind of sorry for Sven," Keith was saying to the others. "The poor guy has had his career cut rather short."

"Well, maybe after he’s out on parole, he could start over again," Lance encouraged.

Keith chuckled. "It is funny that, after all that work, even if those two had succeeded, they would still not even had a dime."

"Yeah," Pidge agreed. "All those overdue bets, dry wells, and unpaid taxes whittled away Uncle Timmy's entire fortune."

"Hey! Like look at this!" Allura spread out the front page of the Arus Gazette for all to see. "‘Robeast Mansion Gains Fame: The old house built over an ancient robeast burial ground, along with mazes of secret tunnels attracts tourists from all over the galaxy!’ Look! There’s Ms. Hagar in the picture!"

"She sure looks happy about all that new business," Lance commented.

"Yeah! And, like I bet your dad is also getting more business, eh?" She pinched the arm of the blue boy sitting next to her.

"I reckon," he said with a grin as he leaned over to give her a peck. Allura giggled and lowered her head to drink some of her chocolate malt, only to hear the tell-tale noisy sound that meant the glass was empty. Confused, because she hadn’t even taken a sip of her drink, she looked down, only to notice that an extra straw was leading from her glass to Hunk’s mouth.

"Hunk!" she declared.

Hunk gave her an innocent smile. "Rorry. Hehehehehehehe!"

Lotor was now laughing as well. He took Allura’s straw out of her glass and placed it in his own. "Now I know how come you always so thin," he chided. She scrunched up her face, then laughed too and bent to sip from his chocolate malt.

"I’m glad everything turned out all right," Pidge said between mouthfuls of ice cream.

"Me too," Keith added. "However, I do wonder about that burial ground."

"What about it?"

"Well...what if it is haunted?"

Pidge slammed down his spoon. "That’s silly! There’s no such thing as ghosts. I told you that before!"

Keith smiled surreptitiously. "Oh...I’m not so sure..." He looked across the table.

"ROOOOO...." came an eerie voice.

Allura turned to her left. Staring her in the face was the red robeast. "ZOINKS!!!" She jumped straight into Lotor’s lap and clung to his neck for dear life. "A GHOST!!"

With that, the creature pulled off the mask, revealing a snickering face.

"HUNK!!!"

"Hehehehehehehe!!!" Soon everybody laughed along.

THE END!!